Ignorance IS Bliss
by Erin Elric
Summary: BW A humor fic about the Predacons and all the crazy things that happen to them.


Hi. This is my first Beast Wars fic. Oocness will happen--after all, this is a humor fic--but I'll try to keep them a little bit in character. Read review no flames. A special thank you to my friend Ducks GO Quack who beta read this.

Ignorance IS Bliss 

It was quiet on board the Predacon base known as the Darkside. Of course, it was the middle of the night, so Waspinator wasn't expecting much noise while he was on night patrol. "Why does Waspinator all ways get stuck with the lousy missions?" He buzzed to himself. Oh, how the wasp hated night patrol--he'd rather be scrapped than be on night patrol!

…Okay, maybe he didn't hate it that bad. He sighed as he turned the corner to go down the hallway.

Just then, he thought he saw something. He dove back behind the wall and drew his guns, preparing for a Maximal attack or something. He jumped out from behind the wall to find that nothing was there. "Huh? Waspinator was sure Waspinator saw something," he said to himself, scratching the back of his head. He shrugged, then put his guns back in their holders and continued on with patrol.

Soon, Waspinator was wondering if he was going insane. He kept feeling like he was being watched. He looked around the area--no one was there. At first he thought maybe one of the other Predacons was pulling a prank on him, but he knew none of them would be awake at this hour. He wouldn't even be, if he had a choice of the matter that is. Then he saw something dart down the hallway leading to the sleep chambers. "Waspinator have thing now!" he exclaimed, drawing his weapons and chasing after it.

As he soon as he turned it was gone again. He buzzed in annoyance as he walked back into the main hallway, not wanting to wake the other Predacons. He knew it wasn't a fellow Predacon, considering one--none of them would be roaming the halls this late at night, and two--he would have heard the door to one of the sleep chambers open. It wasn't a Maximal because they would have tired to scrap him by now. So what was it?

…That's when he saw a brief flash of white. He turned around and there was nothing there again! Leading him to one conclusion…"GHOST!" he screamed as he took off running. "GHOST! There's a ghost on the ship!!!!"

He continued with his running and screaming till someone grabbed him. "Ahhh! The ghost got Waspinator! Waspinator is doomed! Please don't possess Waspinator!" He screamed not looking at the 'ghost'.

"Stop your screaming bug face!"

Waspinator stopped screaming and finally look at who had grabbed him. Terrorsaur had been the one to stop the wasp's running and screaming fit. And to Waspinator's horror, he had woken up the other Predacons--except for Megatron, who could sleep through an attack. He yelped, moving away from the half-awake Predacons.

"What was that screaming about!?" demanded Terrorsaur as the others glared at Waspinator with all their might.

"Waspinator saw ghost!"

"Ghost?" asked Inferno.

"Like boo, spooky see through thing!"

"There's no such thing," said Scorponok.

"What does Scorpion-bot know? Waspinator was the one possessed by ghost! Waspinator know ghost when he see one!"

"But you didn't-"

"Waspinator saw the ghost with Waspinator's optics! Waspinator not lying!"

"I didn't-"

Blackarachnia was fed up with this whole boring conversation. "Would you boys just shut up and figure out what it was he saw so I can get some sleep!"

"Waspinator saw ghost! That's what Waspinator saw!"

"That's what you think you saw. It could have been just a rat." Said Tarantulas.

"Ew!" yelped Blackarachnia looking down at the floor as if it was rat infested.

"Rats aren't big and white and spooky like!" protested Waspinator clinching his fists in aggravation.

"Well you're not the brightest so-"

"Waspinator knows what Waspinator saw!" he screamed, shaking his fists.

"Whatever. I'm going to bed. You boys keep quiet," said Blackarachnia, walking back into her room.

"I want nothing to do with this 'ghost' hunt," said Tarantulas, leaving.

Waspinator looked at the three remaining Predacons. "Please help Waspinator. Don't leave Waspinantor alone with ghost."

"The Queen will not be pleased with this nonsense," said Inferno, shaking his head in worry.

"If we leave him alone he'll just keep screaming till he gets his way," said Terrorsaur.

"Maybe we can tape his mouth shut," said the very tired Scorponok, who was mentally cursing himself for not getting out of this situation when he had a chance.

"No don't tape Waspinator's mouth shut!" screamed Waspinator, backing away from them again.

"Stop screaming you'll wake up the Queen!" yelled Inferno.

Waspinator flinched then covered his mouth as if that would prevent his screaming. "Waspinator sorry. Waspinator will stop screaming." He mumbled, moving his fingers away from his mouth.

"So how are we going to catch this so-called ghost?" asked Terrorsaur, being rather skeptical about the whole idea.

"Not so-called! Waspinator really saw ghost!" pleaded Waspinator, waving his arms again in frustration.

"Fine, whatever."

"Maybe we should have this meeting elsewhere," said Scorponok, gesturing to the two rooms that the spiders lived in. "I kind of like life and all."

Terrorsaur threw up his hands in the air. "Whatever!" he yelled.

"Shut up!" yelled Blackarachnia as she opened the door of the room just a crack so they'd hear her.

"We're moving then," he said in a hushed tone almost a whisper.

"What?" asked Inferno rather loudly.

"I said we're moving! I mean--I said we're moving." He said whispering the second sentence.

Inferno nodded and began to walk to the adjacent hallway.

"No we can't go there. That's where Waspinator saw ghost! Ghosty will hear the plan and ruin it all!"

Inferno's optic twitched as he turned around to face the bee. "What did I tell you earlier?" he asked, drawing his weapons.

"N-no more yelling," Waspinator said, voice shaking.

Inferno returned his weapons to their normal state and walked on as the other two Predacons dragged the scared wasp.

The main hallway that Waspinator was patrolling earlier was quiet and undisturbed.

"I don't see any ghosts," said Terrorsaur.

"Waspinator said ghost, not ghosts."

"Whatever! The point is I don't see anything out here!" he yelled glaring at Waspinator.

"Waspinator all ready said Waspinator not lying. Waspinator really saw a-" he suddenly stopped talking his purple optics widened. He gasped and ran off to the hallway where the sleep champers were at.

"Hey don't run when I'm yelling at you!" Terrorsaur called. He shook his head and turned to face the other two Predacons. "Every day he gets a little bit weirder." The other two ran past him. "Hey! What in the world is everyone running from!?" he called.

The two ignored him completely.

"Is every one going crazy?"

Suddenly he sensed some one standing behind him. He thought about it for a minute and realized that he was the only one left in the main hallway. "I'm not falling for it guys. I know this is just some prank you came up with." Terrorsaur crossed his arms and turned around. "There's no such thing as a…GHOST!" he screamed at the see-through apparition. He turned tail and ran as fast as he could back to the living quarters.

Terrorsaur's shrill screaming bounced off the walls as he charged down the hallway. Scroponok and Inferno were all ready halfway down the hall.

One of the doors opened and Blackarachnia walked out. "I told you boys all ready! I'm trying to s-" before she could finish that sentence Inferno ran into her, knocking her halfway across the floor. She growled as she got back up. "Why, you stupid ant! Watch where you're going!"

"Sorry," he said, looking around with a wild look in his optics. "Did it follow us?"

"Did what follow you?" she asked.

"I don't think so," said Scorponok as he stopped running.

"What is going on?" she asked waving her hands in a failed attempt to get their attention.

Terrorsaur still screaming ran past Scroponok and Inferno and came to a stop near Blackarachnia.

"I take it you saw it too?" asked Inferno

He nodded

"Saw what!?" demanded Blackarachnia, who was tired of being ignored.

"G-g-ghost!" yelped Terrorsaur, pointing back to the hallway they ran from.

She rolled her optics. "Please. You've been hanging around Waspinator too long."

"No, really, we saw it. With our own optics."

"Oh? What did this ghost look like?" she asked, crossing her arms.

"Big!" yelled Scorponok, holding his arms out for emphasis.

"See-through!" yelled Inferno.

"And ghost like," finished Terrorsaur.

She laughed loudly. "Big, see-through, and ghost like. That's some great observation there boys," she said, still laughing.

The three ignored her.

"We must tell the Queen!" yelled Inferno

"What can Megatron do? Run and scream in terror like the rest of us?" asked Scorponok.

"The Queen is a fearless leader!"

"We need to call the Ghostbusters or a priest!" yelled Terrorsaur, bringing his hand up to his face.

"What kind of stupid plan is that!" yelled Scorponok, poking Terrorsaur in the chest plate.

Terrorsaur slapped his claw away. "At least I have a plan. Unlike you."

"I do too have a plan!"

"Which is?" he asked in a cocky tone of voice, smiling widely as he crossed his arms.

"Ummm…"

"I thought so."

"Well, anything is better than your idea."

"Even telling the Queen?"

"Okay, I take that back."

Inferno glared at the two, drawing his guns.

"I hate to interrupt your meeting of the minds, but where is Waspinator?" asked Blackarachnia.

The three paused, then looked at one another.

"The ghost got him!" yelled Scroponok.

"It couldn't have! He ran off before any of us," said Inferno.

"Then what did happen to him?" asked Terrorsaur.

"Did you think to check his room? Knowing the coward he probably hid in there under the covers," said Blackarachnia.

"He wouldn't do something that stupid, would he?" asked Inferno.

"It wouldn't surprise me," said Terrorsaur as he opened the door to Waspinator's room.

Sure enough, Waspinator was there and hiding under the covers, his striped back end showing.

"Waspinator not here. Go find other Predacon to eat, ghost-bot," said Waspinator.

"It's us, you idiot."

He looked back at them still mostly under the covers. "Ghost-bot didn't eat you!" he buzzed happily as he jumped up and ran over to them.

"Do ghosts even eat bots?" asked Blackarachnia.

"Waspinator not want to find out. That's why Waspinator was hiding."

"Blackarachnia thinks that Wasp-bot is a coward."

"Feme-spider shouldn't make fun of the way Waspinator talks."

"Do you have any plans as to what to do about the ghost?" asked Terrorsaur.

"Run and hide!"

"Other than that."

"No, really--run and hide!" he screamed pointing behind them.

"The ghost is in the hallway isn't he?"

He nodded.

"Oh slag!" The three male Predacons yelped as they ran around the room screaming.

"Would you calm down? I doubt it is real anyways," said Blackarachnia as she turned around. Sure enough, floating down the hallway was a big white thing that looked like the ghosts from Pac-Man. She screamed bloody murder as she dove behind the trembling Waspinator. "Protect me!"

"Why?"

"You're a man aren't you? You're supposed to protect females," she said, placing her hands on his shoulders and shrinking down behind him.

"After female-spider-bot made fun of Waspinator?"

"Whatever, just do something!"

He stepped forward—well, more like pushed by her. "Ummm Ghost-bot, Waspinator wants to talk to Ghost-bot."

"What are you doing, fool?"

"Talking to it."

The ghost floated up to them.

Blackarachnia backed away as the other three Predacons cowered in a corner.

The ghost was floating in front of him.

"Waspinator…wants Ghost-bot to leave," he said, voice trembling.

It still stared at him.

"Please."

It vanished.

"Waspinator got it to go away!" he cheered.

The other Predacons slowly walked up to him.

"See? No more ghost-bot now. We're safe now."

The others stepped out in the hallway.

"Night!" he announced, walking back over to his bed.

As soon as he laid down, there was a knock at the door.

"Yes?" he asked as he walked back over and opened the door.

"Got rid of the ghost did you?" asked Terrorsaur pointing back at the ghost, which was floating in the hallway like it owned the place.

"Ghost!" he yelped as he ran past them and the ghost, charging down the hall toward Megatron's room.

"Wait, Waspinator don't hide in there!" called Terrorsaur, following him.

"The Queen! The ghost will find him!" screamed Inferno, chasing them.

"Wait for me!" called Scorponok as he followed them.

Blackarachnia, being tired of all the yelling, went back to her room--forgetting about the ghost since it hadn't brought any harm to her.

Waspinator ran into Megatron's room.

"What is the meaning of this intrusion?!" he demanded.

"There's a ghost loose on the base!"

"A ghost?"

He nodded.

"Go back to bed. I'll deal with it in the morning, yesss." He said closing his optics again to tired to deciplin the annoying wasp.

"But Megatron, ghost-bot will bug every one."

He opened on optic and said. "I only see a bug, bugging me right now."

"Wait!" called a shrill voice that only belong to one mech in their group."Don't do anything stupid!" yelled Terrorsaur as he ran in the room.

Megatron soon decided that he would have a better chance getting answers from him than Waspinator "Terrorsaur, what is this he babbling about?"

"There's a ghost."

"Really?"

"Really." He said, nodding.

He rolled his optics and got up from his chair. "I think you two are seeing things. Or… you two are playing a prank." He said glaring at the two

"No really there's a-" started Terrorsaur but was interrupted by.

"Queen!"

Megatron flinched as Inferno ran into the room. "Queen, the colony is in danger from a-"

"Let me guess a 'ghost', yess?" he asked, tilting his head to one side in thought.

"Yes," Inferno said, nodding

"I doubt it."

"But we really-'

"MEGATRON!" screamed Scorponok. "There's a-"

He sighed loudly. "Ghost? So I've heard."

"Oh… sorry. Could you… you know do something about it?" he asked his voice trembling.

"If it means I get to go back to bed and get some sleep, then yes," he said, walking out the door.

The four Predacons followed their almighty leader back to the infamous hallway.

He soon saw the floating see-through ghost.

"Are you the ghost yes?"

"That's him my queen!" yelled Inferno from within the group.

"I can see that," Megatron said, looking back at them and then turning to the ghost.

He studied it for a minute…then frowned.

"What's wrong?" asked Scroponok

"Tarantulas!" Megatron bellowed.

The purple spider stepped out of his room. "Yes?"

He pointed at the ghost. "You may have fooled them. I'm not falling for it."

"I have no idea what--"

He picked Tarantulas up off the ground. "I'm wise to your tricks. Make it go away!"

"Fine," he said as Megatron dropped him. He stepped back into his room and came back with a remote. Tarantulas pressed a button and the ghost vanished. "There, happy?"

"Yesss." He turned to the others. "Now….go back to bed so the rest of us can get some damn sleep!"

They nodded.

One door opened up. "I told you boys shut the – oh, Megatron, I didn't realize that was you yelling. Sorry," said Blackarachnia, walking back into her room.

Next chapter coming soon, ideas for the next chapter are welcome. Remember Read review no flames.


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